The 9 Simple Rules To Riding a Cambodian VIP Bus.

TM and I took a bus from Siem Reap to the Cambodian capitol city of Phnom Penh. The ride was on the "Paramount Angkor Express" and was arranged through our wonderful hotel in SR. The cost of the ticket was $10 for the approximately 5.5 hour ride and was to include a free breakfast (which we never got), on board toilet (which was unusable because of luggage) and air conditioning (of course the fine print probably excluded anything like freon to actually make the air cold). The trip was only slightly painful for me but more so for TM as his seat was under a tv anchored from the ceiling meaning that his 6ft 4in frame couldn't sit completely upright in his seat. Also, given that the bus used was an old Japanese tour bus (like the ones we take to our layover hotels in Japan) the seats were designed for a 5ft 4in rail thin Japanese tourist, not an American.
Anyway, the bus ticket came with some rules that I though I would share with you and the nine rules to properly riding a "VIP BUS" from SR to PP are as follows...
(These are verbatum from the ticket)

1-The passengers should attend to bus terminal 20 minutes before departure time.
2-The passengers don't come on time, their tickets are worthless
3-Non refundable tickets are sold.
4-Over 5 years old child must buy ticket too.
5-There's necessary duty, passengers must inform company 4 hours before (in the time working) for changing departure time only.
6-Passengers make reservation seats must buy tickets 5 hours before (in the time working).
7-Company will charge passengers' luggage which is more than 25kg
8-Pets, arms, addicted drugs, smuggling products and other dangerous materials are not allowed to bring into the bus
9-PLEASE KEEP QUIET.

So here are some thoughts on the "9 Simple Rules to Riding a Cambodian Bus", not starring John Ritter.
Number 9 seems to exclude any Cambodian wishing to yell into a cellphone. This is made more excruciating as Khmer (the language..and the ethnic group) is NOT a relaxing, beautiful language. Add to that the seemingly correct way for old women to speak Khmer is in a harsh, high pitch squall and it is nearly unbearable.

Number 8 begs the question as to what an "addicted drug" is? I've never seen a marijuana plant out and about looking to "score some crank".
Number 6-7 "in the working times" is one of the greatest phrases ever uttered.
and finally...I love the bluntness of number 2. Your ass better be at the station or you're gonna get stuck as your tickets will be worthless.

I will be getting back to the US on Thursday and will be posting a couple more stories as well as getting pictures on line. Also, the story of my police office bribes and the attack of the monkeys are coming soon so stay tuned!